There are many ways to immigrate to America, but arriving on its shores in a boat from Haiti isn't one of them. That's what more than 200 Haitian migrants discovered when they jumped off a freighter in Florida and were promptly rounded up and detained, before they had a chance to vote in the Nov. 5 election.

But their case still became an important election issue, with Haitian immigrants urging Florida Gov. Jeb Bush to call big brother and say, "Come on, George, let them stay. They're willing to do just about anything, even catch alligators in our sewers. There's also a slight chance they'll be willing to become Republicans."

Supporters of the Haitian migrants want them to receive the same treatment as Cubans, who are allowed to stay in America no matter how they get here: floating on a raft, stowing away on a ship, hiding under Anna Nicole Smith's dress.

The Haitians believe their detention has something to do with race -- and I agree. It has everything to do with race, particularly the Haitians' inability to race away from immigration authorities.

Only a few Haitians managed to get away. Immigration officers are lucky the boat did not come from Kenya, because Kenyans are good runners. Kenyans dominated the 2002 New York City Marathon, taking the top spot in the women's division and top three spots in the men's. Imagine how much faster they'd run being chased by immigration officers. It would be better than steroids. Trust me.

The Haitians, unfortunately, weren't quite that speedy, partly because the long trip had exhausted them. Perhaps they also believed they'd be welcomed to America, much like the Cubans. Anyone from Cuba is automatically granted political asylum, even if they can't play for the New York Yankees.

This long-standing policy assumes that Cubans are running from a repressive regime, whereas Haitians are just running from poverty (or at least walking from it). But what about people from other countries ruled by tyrants, countries such as Iraq and Libya? Why aren't they automatically given political asylum? Why must they go to Kinko's for their green cards?

The Haitian migrants enjoyed only a few minutes of freedom on American soil and weren't able to get green cards the usual way: by marrying Americans. "I can afford a bride," said one man. "I just can't afford a minister."

Many immigrants have gained permanent residency through jobs -- and not just baseball jobs. If you're highly skilled, you're highly welcome. But the Haitians won't get a chance to show what they can do, aside from steering a boat back to Haiti.

Yes, for all their efforts, they will likely gain only a stamp from the Immigration and Naturalization Service, a stamp that says "return to sender." Their only chance, besides a presidential reprieve, is to somehow prove that they deserve political asylum.

Haitian woman: "I want asylum because I have run away from a dictator."

Immigration officer: "Do you mean President Aristide?"

Woman: "No, I mean my mother-in-law. She is always telling me what to do. Please don't send me back. I would rather go to Cuba."

Officer: "Excellent idea! If you go to Cuba, then come here, we might let you stay."

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