|Volume 4, Issue 13 ~Your Source for Humor on the Internet ~ September 17, 2003|
Epilogue - We Find Reality Just As We Left It
by: Gene Doucette
It didnít take long to settle back down into our lives again once we got back. All we really needed was for something to go wrong.
You can say a lot of bad, potentially libelous things about Disney World, but you have to admit, not much goes wrong there, at least not so youíll hear about it. If there is a sinister side to Disney it can be found in the fact that they are not subject to state laws. The entire 47 acres are considered private property; the police have to request permission to enter. So what DOES happen there is kept quiet. Itís a utopian environment enforced by a totalitarian regime.
But itís a benign regime, and for the most part the people who work there really are friendly, and everyone will do everything they can to make sure everybody is happy.
On the opposite side of the spectrum is the real world, and by that I mean the phone company, which took four days to restore our service. We discovered we had no telephone the moment we walked back into our home. This is not a nice thing to do to someone who has been deprived of the internet for seven full days.
The kids slid back into reality quite well, although Timmy did have a problem at first when he walked through the threshhold and immediately asked for his new Lego toy, which of course was not going to arrive at our house for another full week. But we had so many other things to throw at him he survived this bout of IWant.
We didnít get the dog back for another day. John brought her by early the next morning after it was clear we werenít going to answer our phone on account of we didnít have one. John did not look happy, and only partly because heíd undergone a hernia operation that Wednesday. The day after we dropped Rhiannon off with him he discovered an enormous hot spot under her neck and had spent the week trying to treat our skittish dog while keeping her from scratching a bigger hole in her neck. This is very difficult to do when you cannot bend over without aggravating your stitches.
But except for the phone and the dog, nothing else had really changed.
I think itís fair to say this yearís vacation was a more positive experience than last yearís. But a high colonic is also better than last yearís vacation, so this isnít saying much. What amazes me is that even though we had three more days in Disney this time around, we still approached every day with the same sense of urgency as before. Because thereís so much to DO there. And we somehow managed to do nearly everything we set out to do. Except relax. Iím wondering how many days we have to schedule ourselves for in order to be able to do everything and relax as well. Iím not sure this is even possible.
One thing I noticed this year that slipped my attention last year is how much Disney has gotten into the concept of education. Every single ďNewĒ ride theyíve introduced since Epcot opened seems to be geared much more toward teaching than entertaining. In a few cases they got downright preachy.
Iím not sure if I want my children to be taught anything from Disney. Letís consider some of the life lessons weíve already learned from bastion of educational mores:
Anyhow, we are hoping to make the trip back again next year. We figure now that weíve done everything, we can approach it all at a much more leisurely pace.
At least, this is what weíre telling ourselves.
Maybe two weeks will be long enough.
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