Humor Blog Highlights

WANTED: Professional Bathroom Attendant

© Sergione / Dollar Photo Club

The prestigious Roosevelt Hotel is proud to announce an opening in our Restroom Services team for a self-motivated professional in the lavatorial arts.

Experience required – this is NOT an entry-level position!

Guests at the Roosevelt expect the utmost in care and professionalism in every aspect when they visit our hotel, not only in our award-winning restaurants and on our world-class polo fields, but also extending into our private, world-renowned restrooms located throughout our facilities as well.

Our ideal candidate is an expert in:

  • The pristine care of up to half a dozen diamond-quality urinals found in our executive washrooms
  • Delicate pampering of guest genitals upon conclusion of their lavatorial visit (i.e. our distinguished Dry and Tuck Policy)
  • Not making eye contact with our guests at any time
  • Immaculate concern for the sparkling presentation of their work area
  • A passion for treating each guest’s micturition as if it were the most rewarding part of their day

Salary is consummate with experience; this is a non-tipping position.

Potential applicants should be prepared to showcase their full skillset in practice during the interview process.

A drug urine test is required of all our staff in this position simply because we think it’s funny.

About Scott Sevener (572 Posts since 2001)
The Co-Founder and Editor-in-Chief of Just Laugh, Scott writes about the random things in life that amuse him - from the miracle of childbirth to the bologna sandwich he just ate for breakfast. He currently resides in Tampa, FL with a girl, a baby, and a dog that never shuts the hell up.