Day #3: Lions, and Tigers, and Carnies - Oh My!!! (continued)

Throwing up is bad.  That's just common knowledge with most people and we here at Just Laugh believe very strongly in this theory, yet for some unknown reason kids still line up in troves to get their stomaches turned inside out - and they're even willing to pay for it!  There must be some way that we can cash in on this...
 

This ride looked kinda cool at first, but then we realized that they're not actually hanging in mid-air.  Everyone is laying on plastic boards with their arms outstretched like Superman, and then the whole thing spins.  As fun as it may seem, we're certain that the same basic effect could be achieved with a bottle of <Insert Your Favorite Liquor Here>.

Nicknamed "The Boat of Death," it's like sitting on a giant swing with a bunch of strangers.  Unlike in a normal boat, however, the passengers often forget to bend over the railing before they puke. And no, they won't let anybody ride in the crow's nest.  We asked.

Remember that summer you spent with your friends rolling each other down the hill in your neighbor's garbage can?  We all did it at one point or another, but why?  More importantly, what happens to the brains of these people who eventually go on to ride death machines like this next one?
 

They rock, they spin, and if you're really lucky, the carny doesn't blow smoke into your cage before he starts the ride.  This seems more like some sort of torture device than anything else.  People scream throughout the entire ride, and you just know that it must be a great time when you or your companion finally loses it and tosses her cookies while you're inverted thirty feet up in the air!

The rides designed for the really little kids are sometimes even more entertaining than the big ones, so why don't we ever get to ride them ourselves?  Chances are we wouldn't have to worry about throwing up doing such a basic activity as sliding, but anyone over forty-two inches tall is grossly overlooked in this department.  It's really too bad because you're never too old for sliding, right?
 

The Inflatable Experience Resembling the Titanic during its last moments above water, this ride is a favorite among the little ones.  Supervision, however, is of the utmost importance here, as shown by the attendant currently on duty. Are you experienced?

If anything else, the free food definitely makes Alpenfest worth the trip!  Tonight they had an ice cream social planned, so we showed up and were actually even social for a few minutes!  Well, we were basically there for the free dessert, but at least we were civil.  Rumor has it that they ran out of bowls, then ice cream, then random toppings one by one, but we're special so we got right in.  It's not who you know, it's who you're willing to be friendly with in order to cut in line.  It wouldn't have mattered if Godzilla had been up front, we would've came up with something to talk about...
 

Soft serve ice cream isn't normally served with a scoop, but here at the Alpenfest, they make do with what they've got.  This picture shows a volunteer, who specifically requested to remain faceless, guarding over the precious goods. Actually, this man didn't have a head, but we have more respect for the disabled than that and opted to work around the issue.

Tomorrow promises to offer many great opportunities, including the Spam Carving contest, plus a look at some of the people attracted to this psycho circus!  See you then...