# of times Fox News will spin being a good public speaker into a bad thing – 37 # of times Joe Biden will get nudged awake despite already being awake – 3 # of times John Boehner will look, act, or in any way resemble an actual human being – 0 # of times President Obama will internally sigh and wonder if it’s too late to just be President of Kenya instead – 1.5 % of American economy derived from hair care products for Donald Trump – 4.7% Price of a gallon
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