Humor Blog Highlights

HUD Secretary Ben Carson Spends $1.2M on Gold Statue with Large Ears

© Scott Maxwell / Adobe Stock

WASHINGTON, D.C. (Just Laugh) – On the heels of reporting that the Department of Housing and Urban Development spent some $31,000 on a dining room set for Secretary Ben Carson’s office after being pressured by his wife, Candy Carson, to find additional funds for redecorating to exceed the predetermined $5,000 cap, Just Laugh uncovered several additional extravagant line items in Carson’s expenditures that raise serious red flags about the state of the HUD’s budget…

Such items include:

  • (1) Gold Statue with Exceptionally Large Ears – $1.2M
  • (36) Ornately Carved Onyx Tea Spoons – $57,000
  • (12) Copies of the 1997 Walt Disney Pictures Hit Air Bud on DVD – $125
  • (2) Tickets to See DJ Snake This Weekend at the Echostage – $80

“Everything in my department has a purpose,” Mr. Carson explained in his iconic monotonous, slumber-inducing voice, “and this beautiful, gold statue is no exception. It’s a reminder that we always need to be listening to the people – because the American people are golden.”

“Besides, you can’t even buy a decent gold statue with large ears for less than $900,000 – everybody knows that.”

Mr. Carson then casually put his feet up on the table to reveal a pair of exorbitant, gold slippers upon his feet, to which he commented upon our noticing, “These beautiful, gold slippers are a reminder that it’s time for me to take a nap. It’s time for all of us to take a nap now…”

About Scott Sevener (579 Posts since 2001)
The Co-Founder and Editor-in-Chief of Just Laugh, Scott writes about the random things in life that amuse him - from the miracle of childbirth to the bologna sandwich he just ate for breakfast. He currently resides in Tampa, FL with a girl, a baby, and a dog that never shuts the hell up.